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A Slenderian Tale
A Slenderian Tale Prologue It was a normal day at Nexon City. At least, it was normal for the average Nexonan. There was wild speculation among the crowds at the city’s market square as a few vehicles from the Imperial Nexonan Police Force arrived at the scene. There were 5 armoured sedans and 2 armoured trucks. While uniformed police officers came out of the sedans, what appeared to be armoured officers came out of the trucks. From those trucks emerged 3 fellows. They had been condemned. The trio was led to the centre of the market square. They were forced into entering cages made of iron bars, one for each of them. A senior police officer came to the scene to start their sentences. “Najib bin Jamal. Theft, specifically pickpocketing. Sentenced to 500 lashes of flagellation,” the officer said in a low and deep voice. There was no trace of emotion, at all. If one tried to compare the announcement of a Nexonan convict’s punishment and a robot’s speech, one would actually find the two to be akin to each other. Najib was let out of the cage. He was forced to lie on a block set up by the officers. “Strip,” the senior officer said. Two officers came and shredded the convict’s clothes. Only then did they force them to lie on top of the block. The senior officer took out what appeared to be a whip. He started whipping the convict without mercy. After 50 lashes, the prisoner was escorted back into their cage and told that they will be whipped for the next 10 weeks, with 50 lashes being imposed on him every week. One particular convict looked in horror as Najib screamed in sheer pain. As the merciless officer flogged the pickpocket, the convict could see red drops of what could only be blood dripping from his back. What’s more was that the officer kept aiming to flog the prisoner’s bloody wounds all the time. By the time the prisoner was lashed 50 times, blood had soaked the feathers of the prisoner’s back . The second convict was called up. However, his punishment didn’t reduce the fear of the third convict at all. The senior officer had his limbs cut off with a katana-like sword and then he was beheaded. That was the usual punishment of a Nexonan murderer. “Damien Wong,” the senior officer said as the third convict was led out of his cage. “Insulting the Emperor and violating the dignity of a royal family member. 1,000 lashes in the form of one-off implementation and capital punishment.” The punishment led to some mumblings among the crowds. Even in a despotic country like Nexon, those who were sentenced to a large number of floggings wouldn’t have their sentence completely carried out at the same time. They would be punished like Najib. The crowds could only speculate what he had done to offend the Emperor. The whippings started. The screams only got louder. More blood flowed copiously. There was no possible way for one to survive being lashed a thousand times. Sure enough, the convict fell unconscious around the 584th flogging. Medical professionals on the scene revived him so that the punishment could continue. By then, the convict wished that he could kill himself. At the moment, there was no other desire for him aside from the desire for a quick death. The whippings ended sooner than he expected. His body, to say the least, was mutilated. Just then, two officers dragged him to a pole that was set up near the completion of his corporal punishment. He was attached to it by an iron spike collar. What the senior officer did next was unimaginable. The senior officer, joined by a few other officers by now, started ripping his already broken and mutilated body with red-hot tongs. More screams filled the scene. Among the first part that was ripped was his genitals. The ordeal lasted for exactly 1 hour. Amazingly, Damien was still alive near the end of the torture. He was barely clinging on to life by now, yet this was what he hated the most. He already began hallucinating halfway into the torture. The senior officer cut off his limbs, leaving him lying on the ground as he couldn’t support himself due to his lack of legs. The limbs were burned in front of him before the convict himself was set on fire for 15 minutes. ---- “The offender had been terminated, Your Majesty,” a police officer reported to the sovereign of Nexon. “I see. You are now excused,” the Emperor said The officer saluted before walking away. The Emperor remained on the balcony of his bedroom, sipping a glass of wine. He had another look at the skyline of Nexon City before he left the balcony. “Shouldn’t have tried to insult my consort,” Emperor Suleiman said to himself in his lonesome. Damien’s crime? Saying that the Empress was hot and the ‘chad’ Emperor didn’t deserve her. In other words, Damien was executed for being a NiceGuy. Chapter 1: The Young President At the age of only 16 years old (at the time of this chapter), Slender was among the youngest heads of state currently. He was the youngest President to be inaugurated, taking office 3 years ago when he was only a few months past his 13th birthday. The Yolkshirian President was hailed by his countrymen as a national hero. This was because he successfully enacted reforms in the country that freed its economy from the grip of the United States of Antarctica. Upon taking office, he enacted a nationalisation programme that saw the ownership of numerous firms and companies transferred from Antarcticans to local Yolkshirians. This move significantly increased the GNP of the country, and the Yolkshirians’ overall standard of living as well. Despite that, President Slender was still regarded as an ally of the United States. It was only a few days ago that he issued a statement promising that he would be “deeply committed to the Antarctic-Yolkshirian Entente”. Yolkshire had been a historical ally of the USA ever since 2002. Since then, the USA had managed to win almost every year that it was involved in, thanks to its alliance with this semi-militarised state. Yolkshirian soldiers were frequently sent on covert operations, for which they were paid with the wages that professional mercenaries would earn. “Hey Slender”, a voice said to the President as he woke up in his bedroom. He had been staying at the Presidential Townhouse (1 Cardinal Avenue, Yolkshire City) for more than a week by then. He would be moving back to his usual residence, the White Fortress, today. “Good morning, Samantha,” Slender said to the First Lady as they laid on the four-poster bed in the master bedroom. He gently caressed her face before drinking the glass of pomegranate juice on the table left of the bed. He then went to groom himself. After taking care of his hygienic needs, which included showering at 7 o’ clock in the morning, Slender and Sam walked to the breakfast room, where their breakfast laid, awaiting to be savoured. The former‘s breakfast was an Egg’s Benedict with avocado smash, bangers, grilled mushrooms and tomatoes, fruit yoghurt and a glass of orange juice, along with a cup of black coffee. Meanwhile, the latter had scrambled eggs with some strips of bacon, toast with marmalade and skimmed milk. The couple dined heartily for every breakfast as they insisted on the belief that one should have breakfast like a king, lunch like a commoner and dinner like a pauper. This was mostly true except that they occasionally ate heartily for dinner as well. “There is nothing else that I love more than you,” the President said all of a sudden to the First Lady, after he had sipped the last drop of coffee. “I love you too, but why did you say something like that all of a sudden?” “I have been having a strange feeling that all we love and all that we have built up together as a couple will be gone in a few years’ time. I just want to tell you that none of my power and wealth matter. What matters is you. I want you to stay by my side for the rest of my life.” “Of course I will. Isn’t that what our wedding vows are for?” “Yeah, you are right”, Slender said again, flashing a smile at her before he continued eating. ---- That night, however, Slender broke his fidelity to the First Lady as he slept with another woman. That woman, whose name was Sandra Young, would later be his most important mistress. Utterly Screwed As the Auburns of Auzua had their breakfast, Damon Auburn’s mind was preoccupied. He was unable to stomach the plate of toasts, olives, gravlax and eggs in front him. He took a sip of the orange juice, but he felt like regurgitating it out of his body only a few moments after consuming it. The patriarch, Jordan Auburn, noticed his odd behaviour and laid down his own fork and knife. Jordan: “Is something wrong, Damon?” Damon: “I’ve been having a really uneasy feeling this morning.” Jordan: “About what?” Damon: “Something bad will happen soon. It will be catastrophic.” Jordan: “Relax, we have nothing to worry about. The island is prospering, the olive farmers had a good harvest this month, we are living in the comforts of luxury and most importantly, we have wiped out our rivals. What could possibly go wrong?” ---- Unknown to the Auburns, Nexonan forces had completely surrounded the island. There were at least 42 battleships, while there were even more naval vessels. Battle for New Koenigsberg A week later, New Koenigsberg was already in the sight of the Allied forces. By then, it was winter at that part of Nexon. The city was surrounded by more than 1.1 million Allied soldiers, 800,000 of whom were Yolkshirians. The Yolkshirian President himself was flown to the mobile Yolkshirian military headquarters a few miles outside of the city’s vicinity. He was immediately saluted by the soldiers as he entered the office of a Yolkshirian general. Slender: “How is the current situation here?” Yolkshirian general: “We’re waiting to be reinforced by 110,000 Margatians. They are expected to arrive soon with some heavy artillery.” Slender: “What do you mean by ‘soon’?” Yolkshirian general: “Around three days’ time.” Slender: “If they don’t arrive after that, we better be-“ At that moment, there was a loud explosion, followed by shoutings and screams. These too were interrupted by gunshots that were faster than raindrops. Slender: “What the fuck was that?” Yolkshirian general: “Let’s see.” The two penguins, along with their soldiers, armed themselves immediately and walked out of the office. What they saw truly shocked them. There were around 200 penguins charging at the base. They were wearing heavily armoured suits that had a black and red paint job. Some were carrying what seemed to be miniguns, others flamethrowers and the rest Multiple-Rockets Launchers. They were inflicting heavy damages on the Yolkshirians. Slender: “What...what are they?” Yolkshirian general: “Suleiman’s Imperial Guards. They are really hard to deal with, so that’s why he believed that 200 of them could make short work of us.” The Yolkshirians took cover as the literal streams of bullets and explosives dawned upon them. One of them, a Corporal by the name of Hugo, managed to jump onto one of these super soldiers and landed on his head. As the Imperial Guard dropped his weapon and attempted to shake him off, some Yolkshirian soldiers took out laser weapons out of the arsenal and started shooting at the imperial guard. One of these shots hit his head, killing him and sacrificing Hugo. Endgame... Lying on the four-poster bed of his bedroom, Slender’s sight was fixed on his wife as she slept. “I have it all. Money, power, respect, and most importantly, a good soulmate,” he said to himself. After he emerged from the seas of his thoughts, the Yolkshirian President went and picked up a nearby glass of whiskey as he was parched. However, he dropped it by accident, smashing it into pieces of glasses and waking his wife up in the process. Samantha: “Ugh, what the fuck was that?” Slender: “Nothing, I’m sorry bae.” The First Lady fell back into her slumber again, this time covering her ears with pillows. As the President was about to sweep the remains of the glass up with a broom, he noticed something odd. The whiskey solution somehow stained the blood red carpet of his room into a shade of dark green. Slender: “What the hell?” Despite being alarmed by this, he still swept it up and dumped it into a nearby dustbin. He suspected it to be either spoilt or poisoned. Luckily for him, he did not drink a single drop from the glass last night as he passed out from exhaustion immediately after pouring it. After taking a shower and changing into a royal blue suit, a white dress shirt, a black tie (tied with a full Windsor knot), black Oxford shoes and wearing his signature wristwatch, Slender took a look at the time. It was time for breakfast. There was a knock on the door. Slender: “Please come in.” The maid entered the room, carrying a tray of Puffish fry up, a glass of tea and a cup of orange juice. Maid: “Good morning, Mr. President.” Slender: “Good morning.” As she approached him, however, Slender saw what appeared to be a combat knife to be hidden among the tray. The maid’s flippers also appeared to be trembling. Without hesitation, he grabbed the pistol hidden underneath the pillow and fired at the maid. The projectile pierced through her forehead before she dropped dead, making a mess on the floor as the breakfast foods and drinks fell. Samantha: “What the actual fuck, Slender?” Slender: “She’s an assassin.” Samantha: “What the heck are you talking about?!” Slender: “Her flippers were trembling as she approached me, and she hid a combat knife amongst the tray.” Samantha: “Bull-“ The First Lady took a look at the spot where the maid’s corpse laid. There really was a combat knife. Samantha: “Oh my god!” Slender: “I think there’s a conspiracy to kill me, babe. Someone poisoned my glass of whiskey.” Samantha appeared nervous upon hearing that. Samantha: “I think the conspirators will try to kill you again since they failed to do so twice.” Just then, a presidential bodyguard appeared in front of the room. He was wielding a MP5 sub machine gun. Bodyguard: “Is everything alright, Mr. President?” Slender: “Not at all. This maid here attempted to kill me. Luckily for me, I managed to shoot her.” The bodyguard took a look at the maid and the knife. Bodyguard: “I see.” He transmitted a message to his superior via his earpiece. Bodyguard: “Lancer secured, boss.” Samantha: “Wait, your code name is Lancer?” Unlike previous occasions, the President didn’t appear nervous about being questioned why his code name was Lancer. It might be because he was nearly assassinated twice within the span of an hour. Slender: “Yeah, don’t you already know?” Bodyguard: “Actually, his new code name will be Corpse, Mrs-“ Slender: “FUCK OFF, SAM!” The President pushed his spouse away as the bodyguard unleashed a torrent of bullets at Slender, who managed to dive for cover even though one of the bullets barely grazed through his hair. He shot the rogue bodyguard in the chest thrice, killing him. Slender: “This is madness!” Samantha: “It is. How are we supposed to figure out who’s loyal to you?” Slender: “We can’t.” Samantha: “So what should we do now?” Slender: “Well, I believe that someone or some people in my Cabinet are attempting to overthrow me. I’ll just have them summoned to the Palace. I’ll have the YSA Director mobilise his agents so that they can act under my direct command.” Samantha: “Are you sure that you can trust them?” Slender: “Yeah, I used to serve there.” ---- The YSA agents were quickly mobilised. They arrived at the presidential palace, where they tried to arrest presidential bodyguards who were suspected of being involved in the conspiracy. They either surrendered or tried to put up a fight, which ended in the rogues’ deaths. The President, the YSA Director, Samantha, a few YSA commanders and a large squadron of elite YSA agents were in the president’s office, the air filled with tension as the agents gathered the latest intelligence. Slender: “Should I declare a state of emergency immediately?” YSA Director: “Let’s wait until we have completed the next task, Mr. President. We have to find out which ones of your Cabinet members are guilty first before we proceed.” Slender: “Alright, I’ll listen to your suggestion.” A few minutes later, one of the agents approached the Director and whispered something to him. The director reported the latest intelligence to Slender. Director: “All of the Cabinet members have been killed, Mr. President.” Slender: “Wait, what?!” Director: “Armed and masked men in military fatigues intercepted them on their way here and shot them all dead.” Slender: “Even Vice President Raul Ho?” Director: “Affirmative, Mr. President. The assailants fired rockets into his limousine. We’re still working on the wreckage.” Slender was left speechless for a moment. An idea suddenly sprang up to him. Slender: “Find out which military general we can trust. Have them gathered on a list. I’ll get them to purge the military.” Director: “Yes sir.” ---- In the White Igloo’s basement command room, Antarctic President Chuck Chong was with his cabinet members and Joint Chiefs of Staff. He was furiously reprimanding the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs and the Director of the EPF. Chuck: “What type of bullshit results did you two bastards just delivered?! How the fuck can you miss killing Slender twice within a day’s time?! I shouldn’t have trusted your ass when you said that you devised an operation to launch a decapitation strike that will turn Yolkshire back into an allied state of ours and make us the sole superpower in the world once again, General!” JCS Chairman: “Don’t worry, sir. We just had all of his cabinet members killed.” Chuck: “The mole inside the cabinet is still alive, right?” EPF Director: “He is, Mr. President.” Chuck: “Good.” After an awkward silence, the EPF Director started speaking. EPF Director: “We can activate the sleeper agents that we had installed in the Yolkshirian Secret Agency.” Chuck: “To do what?” EPF Director: “Kill President Slender, duh!” Chuck: “What makes you think that it’ll work?” EPF Director: “Slender trusts the YSA with his life. He would have replaced the presidential bodyguards with YSA agents by now.” Chuck: “Go ahead.” EPF Director: “Yes sir.” ---- As Slender started speaking with military generals who were still loyal to him via video conference, one of the YSA agents in the room suddenly took out his gun. He fired several shots at the President and some YSA agents. However, he only managed to kill one agent and injure two others before he was shot dead by the army of agents in the room. Slender: “What the fuck?!” YSA Director: “Apparently there are conspirators within the agency as well.” The President turned his attention back to the generals. Slender: “Alright, listen up. Declare martial law at the areas that I’d designated to each one of you. Arrest those whom I had just told you are suspected of being in this conspiracy.” Yolkshirian Generals: “Yes sir!” The video conference was signed off. There was suddenly an explosion that appeared to have come from within the palace itself. Slender: “What the fuck?!” More explosions followed. There were 16 explosions in total. By the time the penguins in the room had regained awareness, they ran out of the room, only to see that parts of the palace were on fire. YSA Director: “We’ll have to evacuate you to the White Fortresss, Mr. President.” Slender: “Alright, fine.” As the presidential motorcade moved to the White Fortress, however, it was attacked by undercover EPF agents. Despite being able to ward off the attack, 9 YSA agents still died in the end. By the time they had arrived at the White Fortress, Slender had fallen asleep, and so had Samantha. As he woke up, she was lying on his left shoulder. He lightly nudged her to wake her up. The president and his allies soon settled at the White Fortress’ massive command room. The intelligence director approached him once again. Director: “There’s a problem, sir.” Slender: “What is that?” Director: “Raul Ho emerged at the Benedict Island provincial capital of Benedict City 30 minutes ago, Mr. President.” Slender: “So he’s the fucking traitor after all! What did he do there?” Director: “He claimed that someone had you and the cabinet killed, but he somehow managed to survive being killed. He then declared himself to be the interim president and rallied the island’s troops.” Slender: “Oh crap. That island’s military commander is not a loyalist.” Director: “The best course of action right now is to release a live TV broadcast showing that you are alive, Mr. President.” Slender: “Alright. Have the agents set up a camera and stuff.” A few minutes later, the YSA Director returned. Director: “I’ve got good news and bad news, Mr. President. The good news is that we have 500,000 troops in the capital.” Slender: “And the bad news?” Director: “First of all, all communications to the other islands are blocked. This means that we can’t convince them that you are still alive.” Slender: “What?!” Director: “Secondly, that’s where the rest of the Yolkshirian Armed Forces is.” Slender was silent for a while. He then spoke in a surprisingly calm voice. Slender: “Well played.” Director: “What do you mean?” Slender: “The conspirators checkmated me. There’s no way that I can win now. They have the upper hands. They’ll march here within a few days’ time and sever my goddamn head!” Director: “Calm down, Mr. President. There must be a way.” Slender pondered for a moment. An idea came to him suddenly. Slender: “I want you to summon the Governor of the National Bank.” Director: “Yes sir!” ---- An hour later, Iskandar Yunos was summoned to the White Fortress. Slender talked to him in a private room, along with a few senior YSA leaders. Slender: “Listen here. You have an important task.” Iskandar: “Oh, what is that?” Slender: “The country will soon fall to enemy hands, Yunos. I need you to move our country’s wealth to Nexon.” Iskandar: “What do you mean by that?” Slender: “I want you to move the National Bank’s entire foreign exchange reserves to Nexon. In addition, order the chiefs of each major bank to move their liquid assets to the continent as well. If they do not comply, force them to do so. You have the YSA to help you out. I want everything valuable on Central Yolkshire Island to be vacated to the continent. Museum artefacts, artworks, important research papers, everything. The country’s best brainpower must be moved there as well.” Everyone: “Yes sir!” ---- Shipment by shipment, the valuables were transported by air to Nexon. However, as the days passed, the enemies were nearer to the island. 9 days later, the capital city was in chaos as the conspirators had infiltrated it in masses. There were gunfights daily between the YSA and the conspirators. Slender did not care about the anarchy, however. He was busy telephoning his mistress Sandra Young. Slender: “I’ll have you evacuated out of Yolkshire by tonight. I’ll have you hidden among one of the jets flying to Nexon City.” Sandra: “Alright bae. I can’t wait for you to give it to me once we arrive at Nexon City.” Slender chuckled. Slender: “Of course, bae. Of course I will give it to you.” As he ended the call, he walked into his bedroom at the Fortress. Samantha was busy packing her personal belongings. Samantha: “What will exactly happen once we arrive at Nexon?” Slender: “We’ll start a government-in-exile, Sam. With the assistance of the Nexonan government, we can retake the archipelago.” Samantha: “Umm...” Slender: “What?” Samantha: “I thought ‘you’ are the Nexonan government.” Slender: “What are you talking about?” Samantha: “Compared to the USA, you showed a lot of mercy to the Nexonans during the war. You also helped rebuilt the continent with that controversial 1 trillion CPC foreign aid programme of yours. If you do not intend to rule over the continent, then why the heck did you give them one trillion Club Penguin Coins, with a T?” Slender: “My original intention was to convert Nexon into a puppet state of Yolkshire, but now that I think of it, I do have a lot of power over the country considering that they consider me to be their messiah.” Samantha: “Exactly. Just take over the continent. You are already the ceremonial head of state there. I’m sure that the Nexonans wouldn’t mind electing you to be their leader.” Slender: “Yeah bae.” A YSA agent suddenly barged into the room. He held a gun on his flipper. YSA Agent: “Die!” He unleashed several volleys at the presidential couple. Three of them hit Samantha in the torso, while one hit the president at the same spot as well. Slender: “NO!” The President angrily retaliated by shooting the agent dead. Two more rogue agents appeared, firing their weapons at the duo. The president took Sam’s flipper and his behind their bed. Slender: “ARE YOU OKAY?!” Samantha: “Y-yes...” Slender: “Hang on there, babe. You’ll be fine.” The President fired several shots at the two other bodyguards, killing them. As Samantha attempted to waddle out of her hiding spot, she collapsed on the floor. Slender immediately ran over to her. Slender: “Are you okay?” Samantha: “N....not really... I don’t think...I don’t...” Slender: “Yes? Just say it!” Samantha: “I....won’t make...it.” Slender: “Yes you will! Just stay with me right here!” Samantha: “I-I bled a lot, and so did you...” Slender looked at himself. His white shirt was stained with blood, although it wasn’t much. He then looked at the floor. There was a pool of blood there. He took a closer look at her. Her blouse was stained with her own blood. She appeared weak and pale. He saw the shadows of death looming in her very eyes. Slender: “Noo...” Samantha: “Before I go, I must tell you something...” Slender: “Yes? Just say it...” Samantha: “I’ve al...always known that you aren’t loyal to me, but I don’t...don’t care about that...I love you, Sl...Slender, because I know that you love me more than you love your mist...mistresses in the end...” The president tested up upon hearing this. He was weeping really badly by now. Slender: “I-I’m sorry, Sam...” Samantha: “It’s okay. I still love you...” Slender kissed her one last time on the beak. Tears were trickling down his eyes. Slender: “I love you too, Samantha... I really do...I-“ The president’s sight suddenly faded into darkness as he fell onto the floor, unconscious. ---- Slender regained awareness a few hours later. He looked around and found himself at the bedroom of his presidential jet, lying on a bed. Sandra was lying on the bed as well, looking at him with a worried look on my face. Slender: “Where am I?” Sandra: “We are on the presidential jet, which is currently heading to Nexon City like you ordered.” Slender: “Where’s Samantha?” Sandra: “I hate to break this to you, but she did not make it.” Despite being broken-hearted upon hearing the news that he dreaded, he decided to maintain an illusion of calmness in front of Sandra. Slender: “That was expected.” Sandra: “You really loved her, don’t you?” Slender: “I still do.” Sandra: “Then what am I to you?” Slender pondered for a moment. He knew that he couldn’t risk upsetting her by raging at her. Slender: “You are a companion to me, Sandra. I can talk to you about things that I wouldn’t tell Samantha.” Sandra: “I see.” Slender took a look at her, who gave a smile to him. “You are also my trusty exercise partner,” Slender said before pulling her behind the blankets to have some fun and forget about his woes. ----